There's always a smile on face but inside heart nobody knows

Tuesday, June 14, 2011

drama queen

the title a bit hot n gossip... sometime always drama happened in our life.i dont know what to say. b4 i sleep, i just wanna write something shocked me and forget everything.

for a few month i was thinking about a invitation of my friend about travel to somewhere together. old friend since 4 year ago, maybe 5 years ago. i met regular at kuala lumpur, hard to decide because think about work, leave, discuss with boss and finally i decided.

after i make decision.... my friend mention about something shocked me. since i know my friebd for long time ago..i never asking personal matter because i really think just friend. suddenly when i get an email about partner, have lover, not into relationship n bla bla.... i felt bad because i never think about that. i decided to join the trip just because to not reject the invitation, thats all.

after i got that email...i really not interested anymore. i felt so cheap, even useless., worst, the 3rd person in relationship. arghhhh always like that. if i really special..where is my position?

one thing make me felt worst is..... most people i met for a few year already got bf,lover partner n i'm sure shange many time, even better life, but me? people just come n go, miss u mis u, u r special..but no one understand me HERE!!!!!i felt fed up of the life.

i dont mind if someone be honest at beginning of friendship at least i know, i alert, i keep the distance, barrier, even etc. i respect everyone n always try to not meet someone attached because sometime i felt bad tooo.so sad.

anyway i have integrity, feeling,sensitivity, even i try make people happy with me...always nice to everyone. but pls don't broke my heart...thats all.

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