There's always a smile on face but inside heart nobody knows

Thursday, May 26, 2011

just a story

like usual, i will get headache when i have something to write but pending for long time.

like usual i dont mind to write anything i want..because i think i'm honest...n i must write hwt i want write.

so for those people read this..... pls dont misunderstood and tried accept me as i'm.

i always write about my friend here, because i love them, i miss them and i miss the moment i have with them. when they not around days not complete with them.yeah only some people know who am i.....n i'm sure my family member don't know me 100% like i sharing with my friend.

so let me start the story here........

last week on friday, i really totally down, cry, lost n felt sad because i missed too much my friend. i dont know what i should do....i tried make myself busy, do painting, do cross stitch, exercise, gym,but still i miss them. i miss to laugh, joke, smiling, watching tv on sofa, go out, eat together even more than that.

i'm lucky because one of my friend make a call from far to make me felt better. i appreciate it. was good talk, sharing and laugh.but deep inside my heart....i want more...i hate the life alone..... kind of bored with life.maybe i like a bit commitment..make me forget about world.....

i'm still remember what i wrote to my friend ..."felt like dont want continue life tomorrow" because i will alone and always alone at home. after finished the call..i decided to take shower n pray because i confused..... very down n love to talk with God. so i tell Him everything although i know its crazy n impossible. i just told Him..give me a chance to hav good friend again....someone make my day complete..crazy, funny, full of joke, educated, no hiding something...thats all i dont want more..just a good moment.

then i just gave up with my life...a little bit cry on bed..thinking of my life...if i rich i will leave kuala lumpur n go somewhere..which belongs to me.i just want run my routine of life..n doing something interesting in my life. but its all just dream...then i took shower for 2nd time to make me feel better or calm down. suddenly i heard a sms come in to my phone around 1230am. i just ignore it because maybe a sms from office.

when i ready to sleep, i checking my phone..surpised because i got a sms from my best friend at france looking for help..helping his friend in thats the i know he left kl already. honestly he is lovely person, funny, crazy, full of joke n of course "stupid". hahahha

he agree with that. i have great time with him as friend. he already attached and have good lover and i respect that. God gave me chance to meet wonderful person in my life. i dont know what can i say here, we laughing, joke, dancing, go out together, sharing story, life n he is funny too...... its was miracle for me because i thought i will bored n lonely again.

now i just have good memory with me......the life need to be continue.... hopefuly will meet new friend and old friend , make my life interesting n of course crazy. i'm active person n i like to explore everything in my life.thanks for God, david, khaled, john,chris , sharifuddin n everyone make me feel better.

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