There's always a smile on face but inside heart nobody knows

Monday, December 27, 2010

thinking..... :-(

today feel a bit tiring and not so energetic like at weekend.will sleep early soon.just to update blog for today. many thing to write but i think i just need write this article because i keep thinking nonstop in mind...its painful if i'm not take it out.

in our culture when a single woman attract or hav feeling to someone already married or engaged guy, its really bad and worst.the reason is we dont want destroy that relationship or become third person in the relationship. its hard to explain even we not encourage to do that.

in case of me..... i also feel bad, worst and sometime i try put distance, blame myself, hurting myself, deleted all thing, but i can't stop to thinking someone those helping me in many way. i'm cried, i mad myself, i hate inside.....but what can i do.i wish i can control all the thing. can off and on any switch, at least i dont want think about that person.

i dont mind if someone hurting me because wanna put distance with me. i also dont mind if people leaving me to make me open heart to accept others. but for myself.....i really hard to leave someone i really like, love and miss...because every moment was done is wonderful and hard to is wonderful, friendship is forever, and fun is just short time.

then all the time u will pain because u waiting someone not belongs to u. finally i swear, life is not easy...and maybe i just pretend to be happy but inside nobody knows. one of confuse day to me.

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