There's always a smile on face but inside heart nobody knows

Sunday, November 28, 2010

today photo


some photo last week




my nephew shahir

the cat's sex..lol

every weekend i really surprised because sometime with my garden messy. like some play at my garden. with dry leave, flower n so on. i think the cat make my garden for thier playground. yeah i always saw them. luckily today i saw a couple cat having sex at my garden. was funny because 1st time watch a cat try hard for sex...the male cat look a bit young the compare female cat. a fighting was happen to make sure the male cat is strong enough to hav sex...

then the male cat start show off his penis..licking is n play his leg. hahha then come closer to female cat n kissing..but the female cat still now allow the male cat having her. hahahh now still a bit fighting discuss between them..maybe to get confirmation for future benefit. heheheh then suddenly the female cat open her 'ekor" or "snail" n ready to hav fun. look the male cat bite the female neck m start happy ending...great so lovely of them....

a memory of life




honestly i try to not write this... but as human we can't run from the reality life. i'm so surprised because all my friend from primary school to secondary school getting engaged n marriage...was remember all the gossip that time, "cinta monyet", "hot chick", hot guy"..whatever... so sweet

at terengganu we always busy with study when we at primary school. i can say when i'm 9 years old, we start assembly at one school to hav training for study. they select best student from every school, hav training to be good student. i always got that change. thats why i know many friend because those very intelligent, active in sport, and good person. yeah at 9 years old..some boys start play love with girl from other school. we only can meet at weekend. that time we can assume which is hot chick, hot guy and start gossip.

then from time to time....at primary school we accidentally study at religious school. that time only this school was the best secondary school at my area. we in same class now to compare b4, we fight to get good result n who the best.one more time gossip start again. hahha was nice..but at religious school we can't do more. when i moved to technical school, some of best friend at religious school moved to same school with me.

thats why i said..many memory in my life. now in facebook.... i'm surprised..... A engaged with B, C married with D and got 2 kids, some friend after finish study, start marriage...no need go to university, no need hav diploma, master, or phd and still hav good life. my friend she got 4 kids!!!. wow....i know i start compare with me.......as human i'm jealous. its like an alien in our own life. i admit that. at least when people asking..do u hav partner? i wanna say proudly i hav... but for now , no chance just only busy with work, work n work. but still not rich....no happy ending, just stress with work. arghhh . i also wish wearing a ring on my hand. i always jealous with people with ring in bus, street........ i'm sure its nice.maybe i can find my own ring soon at chinatown...

to my friend azrul rais and roshaida...congrate for ur engage day... this couple nearly hav gossip at secondary school at religious school but azrul rais was gossip with other girl. he is one of hot guy at school and intelligent too. now they r perfect couple i think. wow

Saturday, November 27, 2010

a destiny.....my heart film to eat, pray and love film

wow its was amazing day although just at home today. many thing to write here but i try my best to make short.

the whole day was at home because waiting my brother in law come to house. he got meeting at weekend this week.luckily he left this morning to back hometown.my weekend started with happy potter at cinema on friday night. then at capsquare i bought old cd...my heart film from indonesia. yeah i always listen all soundtrack of that film but never watch the movie. i can say all song is nice.


so early morning friday i watch alone. hmm its was sad love story. really love the place they shooting...look like at Cameroon highland...but at indonesia. a lot of thing can learn from the movie...... some part i agree, some not. but i realize when someone getting marriage or engaged, they always not contact all past friend....start to spend time his lover n forget about friendship. so hard to explain about love...its amazing...the film about one penkid or tomboy named rachel, fall in love with her best friend farel. but she never tell the guy until that guy found his life partner named Luna. luna hav prblm with her heart n waiting for death.end of story one of his friend gave her heart to his gf because his gf hav prblm with heart..best friend..... so the end of story...they guy marriage with his gf...but his friend those gave the heart..always with him anywhere they go..was dramatic film. anyway i'm cried..hehe with rainy outside of my house...

waiting and waiting still my brother in law not come...i cant make date even can't find the date because i really dont know when his finish the meeting. then i start another dvd the American. i bought the dvd at chinatown since 3 week ago. its a thriller film, about an assassin run away from his life because all time people try to kill him at same time he work for assassin group making bullet of rifle.something like that. the climax of story..he found Clara which is a prostitute, fall in love n hav good time. the drama start when he found a gun in clara purse and he was misunderstood. because of his life.... he finished the job and wanna run from his dark life with clara. but the assassin group wanna kill him after finished the job. finally he died with clara after got one shot from bad guy at his secret date place. yeah nice movie....can see we always try to find our happiness when we found our love. same to me...i always say to myself..if i found my love i will leave my life for short time..fall in love, romance, after that build new life. i'm sure its nice.

my brother in law still not coming...then i start watching another movie..... eat , pray love by julie robert. i can say its really creative movie. i know i can say its like american dream..but if u watch this movie u will find many good thing. why i said that? honestly people around me is like that. people try to find a happiness in thier life with many way. they give up, wake up, be positive n down again and wake up, recover themself until he or she find someone can complete thier life. its was nice movie with nice place. amazing

a new york women wanna hav perfect life with a family, kids and better life was travel to bali and meet the asian medicine man...told her he will learn from him and come back after a few year. thats time she think its a joke. she was educated man, hav house, hav career and also a family. but one day she realize she not happy with her husband, finally she ask to divorce from her husband. but no kids. the movie was tragic because the husband really love her so much...but not all we can accept when we not feel comfortable.then she start a affair with young guy but seems not works..yeah young guy sometime become childish and not mature. at same time she still looking for his happiness. then she start to travel to italy.

hmm i wish i can do that. honestly i can say italy is my dream place to go. in that film... its too nice for me. having spaghetti, pizza, cuppicono, with italian song..with a couple kissing at street, with nice building, people, guy and women, motorcyle.. its all make me remember my best friend luigi. i miss him. she learn to speak italian. was funny because mostly italian speak thier language not only my mouth but also with hand. for example when u say mamamia..automatically the put their finger at mouth and express what want to say. hahah its good idea. italian is hot. i nearly to learn italian with my friend..but we not longer in friendship...yeah he found his love in kl.

come back to the story, she happy with her life at italy, architecture, building, culture, people, friendship, language, family. its was nice. they show the great constitution of family. mother, father, son, kids, love n partner.its great film n lovely italy. i wish i'm affordable to do that. not to stay at rich rich place..but to learn about culture, life, people and hav good time. same in the film...the nice shoot at street, was amazing. then she continue the journey to india. this time, they tried to show us..how crowded india..with people, culture, n etc. at india she start to meditation at meditation place. she was learn from his affair partner at new york last time. at this place..she was confusing with herself....because she was happy at italy and why she come to crowded place at india. at italy u can eat nice food, wear nice clothes but at india all is average.but still want to find herself in real life. a climax story at india when one girl need to marriage with a guy... she not know the guy..but because of family choice..she continue and hoping get happiness... the sacrifice a girl for her life and family.... because the culture always better for herself sometime. maybe its asian culture. thats make her so regret what her doing b4..hav good job, house, nice husband and etc. but she need to move on and her soul..happiness and faith.

at the meditation centre, she was close with a guy.....the guy was sharing with her about his life. for me its really sad..... he hav bad time..we all hav bad time, but we must forgive everyone even ourself too. and learn to be good person as much we can. life is easy...the moment of guy crying is really nice..can feel that feeling. when he lost family, lost everything after a bad happen is his life. that make the women start after missing her past husband.then she started meditation and finally she done well in meditation.i hav some friend like meditation..maybe its good time to relaxing mind, body and soul.

the last part in this movie at bali..when she come back to medicine man...and what they guy say is truth... she hav short relationship with her husband, doing meditation and etc. at bali she continue study medicine with that old man. in that bali..the show bali is nice place...a romantic place for everyone. although a small affair. she continue meditation at bali at same time she hope find his happiness.yeah people start busy body when she stil single and keep asking to find partner. an accident happen then start a friendship with a guy from brazil ..a divorce guy too. hav family but his wife too busy with her job until forget about her family. the moment at bali was nice for her n new bf. was great and the guy really nice, masculine and mature. finally the end of story..they fall in love and start the open thier heart although the afraid about heart broken. so nice..finally she found happiness. something a good experience we cant hav by mouth or reading if we not try n feel it.

what i learn about this movie..dont give up, find the happiness although some people ignoring you, or busy with thier life because everyone have their own life path. sometime we feel lonely...same thing happen with people outside there..hoping for happiness too. maybe i'm still not lucky to find my soulmate although some people hoping from me. i afraid...same in this movie..afraid to facing reality, afraid about failure because its pain. honestly i hav some broke heart b4...... many time..but to continue this life...i think positive although its too pain to share here. thats life.

the conclusion of the whole film....they r a good theme...love, friendship, soul, family constitution, traveling, culture, food,experience, people, attitude, meditation, power and etc. was a good time at home.

some photo at bangsar..close to tivoli villa





the cube house bangsar





last week i walked around bangsar area. a place for elit people in kuala lumpur city..love the house there..yeah very drmatic, unique, moden n some architecture style...people say ur dream house. bangsar hav many nice house actually. when i walk at street..all people look at me like strange person..why not..just to hav new viewing..not only in city..just spent my time with something benefit. hopefully. this photo already share with my officemate n big boss, they like my photo..can be one of precedent study. actually many photo of mine was become example when doing research or new design at office. photo in kl, singapoore, bangkok and etc...thanks to john because always bring me to travel with him.......its good!!!. thanks for TJ and patrick too for me the camera..i will never forget ur kindness..

Friday, November 26, 2010

infection

lately at office to much thing happened. ridiculous work, renovation, everyone busy. i'm lucky in my department i'm still healthy. everyone get flu, bad coughing and fever. yeah kind of worry actually. maybe i took honey everyday to make sure i hav natural antibody in my body. at same time i also try to keep healthy and good.

this week...one of my friend in my department got new sick...i dont know its will infection everyone or not..but i'm worry too. yeah its like chicken pox but not chicken pox. she went to private and government hospital...the doctor said..just virus infection...oh my god....i really worry.the whole body full with red mole....pity we hav too much work she attend to office. i also worry n forcing her to stay at home today. she can't stop scratching her body like monkey. hopefully this weekend..she will recover. maybe need to try traditional method. yeah we hav some..like drink coconut water, and using semambo leave..put in water n take shower with that. but in city how to find that leave? hmmm

from that i start worry..if i stay alone..who wanna take care of me..or look at me......right i just start precaution like wash my hand all the time. clean all my keyboard and mouse even my work place. hopefully i'm not get the disease. sometime people easily get chicken pox.

Wednesday, November 24, 2010

just give up

i know i'm not update this blog for long time.i just dont want write what i felt this few week because i gave too much here for my life until i think its nothing n just a waste to share here.

to make short... i just give up for life.... ridiculous work at office, even my personal life. honestly i try my best to be positive but sometime its hard to satisfy everyone. to satisfy work at office, officemate, friend, best friend, close friend, new friend even myself too.

maybe lately too much pressure around me but who care? i want that, i want this, u must do that, u must delete that. u must call them,its not right, thats right n just follow that, arghhhh...... just like a ball moved to right,left,below,above............

i dont know....i dont know with who i should share..... with who i should talk...or with who i must listen...... kind of give up.

Friday, November 19, 2010

right now..by akon

Right Now Lyrics

It's been so long

that I haven't seen your face
Im tryna be strong
But the strength I have is washing away
It wont be long before i get you by my side
And just hold you, tease you, squeeze you till
I was fill all my mind

I wanna make up right now now now

I wanna make up right now now now
Wish we never broke up right now now now
we need to link up right now now now

I wanna make up right now now now

I wanna make up right now now now
Wish we never broke up right now now now
we need to link up right now now now

Girl I know mistake were made between us two

And we show our eyes that now even says somethings weren't true
watch you go and haven't seen my girl since then
why can it be the way it was
coz you were my homie lover friend
[Right Now Lyrics On http://www.elyricsworld.com/ ]
I wanna make up right now now now
I wanna make up right now now now
Wish we never broke up right now now now
we need to link up right now now now

I wanna make up right now now now

I wanna make up right now now now
Wish we never broke up right now now now
we need to link up right now now now

I can't lie

I miss you much
Watching everyday that goes by
I miss you much
Tell i get you back Im gone try
I miss you much
coz you are the apple in my eye
Girl I miss you much
I miss you much
I can't lie
I miss you much
Watching everyday that goes by
I miss you much
Tell i get you back I m gonna try
I miss you much
You are the apple in my eye
I miss you much
I miss you much

I wanna make up right now now now

I wanna make up right now now now
Wish we never broke up right now now now
we need to link up right now now now

I wanna make up right now now now

I wanna make up right now now now
Wish we never broke up right now now now
we need to link up right now now now

I want you to fly with me

want you to fly
I miss how you lie with me
miss I how you lie
jus wish you could dine with me
wish you could dine
the one that'll grind with me with me
said the one that'll grind with me

I want you to fly with me

want you to fly
I miss how you lie with me
miss I how you lie
I wish you could dine with me
wish you could dine
the one that'll grind with me with me
said the one that'll grind with me


I wanna make up right now now now

I wanna make up right now now now
Wish we never broke up right now now now
we need to link up right now now now

I wanna make up right now now now

I wanna make up right now now now
Wish we never broke up right now now now
we need to link up right now now now

Thursday, November 18, 2010

thats life

life sometime is hard...when i can't follow the rhythm, i will start cry.honestly last night i can't pretend to be strong anymore. i just cry for many thing. i know some people said look like a kids. but i think i hav reason not cry for nothing....wish i can write here. i dont want write many thing because not all we can share here. at least i'm doing this just to reduce my pressure not to get sympathy because the day is moving, if u give up or broke heart...life must go on.thats life. just pain inside..... thats life...

Sunday, November 14, 2010