There's always a smile on face but inside heart nobody knows

Thursday, October 21, 2010

gossip and the truth

in this blog..i always be honest...sometime i'm using double meaning term to express my feeling because i always care people around me.... i love them. for me without them...i will never get wonderful life like this.

lately a storm gossip happened at office. its about increment salary. actually its was happened since 2 month ago..some stuff already called to boss's room, but i just keep quite. then yesterday some people from my team got letter of increment. so today everyone surprised because i'm not get the letter. what to do that's life...then people start wanna me give resigned letter because the boss not appreciate my contribution to compare others. from my deep heart, something happen hav the reason. although i know i always work hard...maybe its not my time to get increment. yeah feel bad and sad...but i cant think too much about it because i should thankful what i hav now..hav job, house even my friend always bring me travel.....dinner, n etc.

people will think i'm rich, but i'm not. if we think more money...our life get trouble.thats the truth. some people said u always travel..bought television, computer, stay at big house, seems hav luxury life. hmmm... what i wanna say is i bought the television, buy new CPU after i make loan from my friend patrice. i swear i cant collect the money every month n buy cash for television, i will suffer waiting at same time i was lonely at entertainment. then i decided to buy television then make payment to patrice rm200 every month. now i paid half already. suddenly my computer damage....i realize the processor not so well, even the graphic card, n ram too. thats why i decided to buy new laptop.

the decision to buy laptop is hard for me. i can say, computer, internet is half my life. patrice was gave me the internet for 6 month as my birthday's gift. when the computer damaged...the broadband still working. 2 month without computer, make me worry because the internet gone like that.its just waste like that if i'm not do any action. finally i decided to make loan again with patrice. but because of the worry in my heart..i make loan with other person..but its not work. my heart say cant...n cant. i cant selfish for myself to get computer just for my happiness. then i talked again with patrice to make loan, he agree. then i think again..its cost me a lot to buy laptop...then i down grade, and decide to buy new pc without monitor/screen. its means CPU. its cheaper. then when i'm ready to buy the CPU..i choose the secondhand CPU with reasonable price. because i dont want make more debt, at same time patrice will leave malaysia feb2011. so i need to make sure i pay b4 he leaving.

thats the real story... thats life.... we not the son of sultan, king or billionaire..which is get everything front eyes. i learn about life..step by step.... and i'm sure its happened to everyone. but i need to be careful with my prblm... saving money for future. until now i cant discipline myself to saving my own money. every month always hav important thing to do. thats why i start make least i saw what i spent for my life.i really lucky actually....... anyway....hope people think positive about me. after i got new CPU...i dont want anything anymore. thats enough for my life now.

but for my boss at office, u must open ur eyes.... in team work...people working together...when u gave something to part of the teamwork n another part nothing..its not good at all. u only know the output u get..but u never know who make it..who control and who spent to do that work. and for those people working in my team....lucky all of u get the gift..appreciate it and work hard for our office. thats all.

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