There's always a smile on face but inside heart nobody knows

Thursday, November 12, 2009

next step in life......

people always say " rejected" or "moving on".....same like me, if both of us become liability in every friendship or relationship its good for someone to stop at corner n see what happen. its good us to left all memory behind n moving forward. one of my friend say

"what ever will be, will be, will be....."

its means, if something will happen n u not ready yet or ready..its will happen. if last week i'm happy with many friend came n visit me ..but now this week..i lost one by one.its happen sometime. then if last week i hav good sleep/ dream but this week..all my sleep is nightmare. only know what happen ...n i really worry and afraid.....thats why i asking myself..should i become like this or cheat myself...cheat others people or so on.

i was denial with many people b4....... sometime i can accept it...sometime i cant. i'm not perfect guy.... i always try my best n become a good person to everyone. everyday i always stand at balcony ...facing the with the sun, felt the warm sun, listen the sing of bird..n melt with cool air....... n hope all people understand me. then i know i'm not mature enough.... thats why i afraid heart broken ....because i need time to heal that. people always said if someone gone..n will found new person. its not easy n its not cheap...every relationship is worthy n i always hope i hav good time or memory together. honestly tho replace someone in our heart its not easy like top up the phone credit. its need time...sometime its become worst if we compare with each other.

i know i can hav enjoy with any people, drug, ice, n etc..but i'm not do that because i love myself. i want people love myself with anything i hav too. change? what the bad thing i do n must to change to good thing? i know which one the best n always try the best i can... next step still long journey. n i dont know i will found that light or not. see what happen later

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