There's always a smile on face but inside heart nobody knows

Thursday, January 29, 2009

matahariku........nice song, n good moviee at tv3..jelita

welcome back to kl

many thing happen when i go to hometown.....overall ok, but when i come back to kl, i feel wanna go back to hometown stress, no pressure there. every time just eating, eating n eating. i miss my mother, everyday she asked me, i'm eating or not because i'm not working in kl. she know me n close with me. she knew i will never say the truth because won't make her worry. but the truth is i'm eating everyday

i'm lucky actually, many people care me even ove me. i know, but.......i'm shy because jobless, even dont hav selfconfident to meet, but everything will be ok soon.hopefully. my hair growth now, something happen, but i already cut it b4 its more bad. i must love myself.....those love me n care me, thank you very much.

Saturday, January 24, 2009

cendol n klcc

time to go some nice photo from my computer. i will leave kl with thousand memory, to robert at singapore.......gong xi fa cai...i always think of u ok...hahhah to all friend at malaysia, even outside malaysia....happy chinese new year. why i put my italian friend's photo, hahha just remind me, i'm still not finish design his house for renovation. i promise with u luigi, will send u b4 february. happy holiday. anthony....nak

malaysia sate at night market

hahhaa....... i just waiting the boarding time from home at kl to bus station, so found sate photo. hahaha this is sate in kl, nice n meaty. so the photo below is one way to eat just make a joke with friend at italy. hahha. but i love sate kajang. last time ate with anthony n also sharifudin at damansara. lovely.hmmmmmmm

good bye 2008 n hello 2009

many thing i left behind this day because i concentrate for my trip to hometown. n of course all my prblm i solve b4 going back hometown. long holiday since early january, i miss too much my saa architect's friend especially nazim, haida n farah. this one of naughty PHOTO at saa office....hahahha wory to post at blog, but i dont care anymore......just wanna say i hav nice memory there. hope u all success in ur work. those people put me beside, i'm still mad.....huh!!!!!! LOL.

4 hour b4 going back hometown

just a conclusion for my life..........

i worked b4 at klcc area, (august07- august 08) but i never meet someone interesting b4, even i never hav dream to happy in my life. when i move to new company at midvalley area ( september 08- december 08) i found what i want, even that time i facing many prblm.i'm happy at midvalley office, hav great life, went to gym, hav nice body, met with great person even great friend too.

then after i got new office at klcc area (start feb....) again, everyone disappear. i know them at corner, around me, remember me, but why not meet me.

i'm not dangerous guy, not steal what u hav, even i hav my own self respect. maybe i'm wrong n did mistake, in front of me is a only fake.

when u become a real honest guy, people will use u until they called u kampung boy, but when u become bad guy, people will say u r bitch. so what the hell should i become? disrespect person with 2 face? even up n down person?or else..............its unfair, n of course its not fair to me.i pray the god, u will got what u did to me.......i'm sure the right thing will come to me.........i hate to people impure in relationship. stop pretending in front of me.huh!!!!

Friday, January 23, 2009

bad market

this world become crazy, until i really feel bad....why when they old, they will find the true of love n fun....

see the truth i can explain here........the viewer from my hot profile


i appreciate that, but sometime give me chance to hav right person at right time

run away from heaven to life

its horrible for me although i feel bad with what i done. i try to not that n i really don't know, from where i got the strength to do that. i really give up, fed up n maybe stress. i thought its will become heaven for me n good friend but finally you should leave from that place.

difficult for me to explain here, if the 1st time happen to u, u can be patient n stay away, n 2nd time same thing, but for 3rd time i'm sure u must go n leave it. i deserve to find good friend for me, even care me, love me, sacrifice for hard about this life.

Tuesday, January 20, 2009

need more viewer to become 2000

countdown!!!! countdown!!! Countdown!!!!...... if everyone open my blog, 10 time per a day its will help me soon.

actually, i wanna close this blog one time ago because hav many reason n prblm, but if u hav blog like me, if u wrote same like i did, if u share ur heart with others....u will regret to close it. its like ur life here, ur sweet memory here, ur mistake also here..ur growth up here....even of course u hav nice photo inside.if u not believe it, lets try.

one day at future, i wanna make a nouvel n maybe some of u in my nouvel as my best friend even as my evil. hahhaha. people say always use sentence like "writing on the sky", "writing on the wall " but i writing on the window. hehhe

its transparent but hav many dot dot life.right now, 'm not take photo yet.soonn ok

simply smily smoothly but dont be silly

now i can smile with happy and also have light from deep my eyes. every prblm already settle with friend's support n help. its really hard time for me. even i really pain until i felt down down down. i start re planning again my life. got new friend like liza at my future office. thanks again to many people which is gave me many chance. simply said....i always decide many decision with my feeling not with mind. its not good, but its life......we need always be fair in any games.

then the smily mine because i will go hometown soon, now no more prblm n ready for my sister engagement day with her future husband. long time not see my family, i really miss them. i know i'm not always contact them, but its good at least they will miss me. ariff!!!!especially my mother n father....still asking me become steward n model....Ma!!!!! n abah !!!!its funny...i'm not so kind of that la.......

now everything move smoothly...very good. no more argue, no more question mark in mind, looking new friend to make relationship..hahhahha n hurt again. its life la..........thats sweet memory when u getting old... old? hahhaha i'm will become 24, still young la.....but i wish i'm 18 years old......the time move faster now.......i need to hav good career n good life too. no more fun, feel like old man now.still hav energy

Monday, January 19, 2009

'grass is always greener on other side'

i need time........i need support n help

Sunday, January 18, 2009

35 reason why i love you

i just getting bored at home because not feeling well, still feel wanna vomit n a little bit fever. so just fooling around n i found nice article. 35 reason why i love u....because i always asking myself...why 2 person can be love each other? what is love n so on..... to those people in love congrats..n wish u love let i share with all of u.....

1. I can be myself when I am with you
2. Your idea of romance is dim lights, soft music, and just the two of us.
3. Because you make me feel like, like, like I have never felt before.
4. I can tell you anything, and you won't be shocked.
5. Your undying faith is what keeps the flame out of love alive.
6. You and me together, we can make magic.
7. We're a perfect match.
8. Thinking of you, fills me with a wonderful feeling.
9. Your love gives me the feeling, that the best is still ahead
10. You never give up on me, and that's what keeps me going.
11. You are simply irresistible.
12. I love you because you bring the best out of me.
13. Your terrific sense of humor.
14. Every time I look at you, my heart misses a beat.
15. You're the one who holds the key to my heart
16. You always say what I need to hear (You are perfect)
17. You have taught me the true meaning of love.
18. Love is, what you mean to me - and you mean everything.
19.You are my theme for a dream.
20.I have had the time of my life and I owe it all to you.
21. When I look into your eyes, I can see your heart.
22. Your love for me is a natural anti-depressant.
23. I love to hear your voice.
24. Your love has helped me to rediscover myself.
25. Your love is an effective anti-dote to despair.
26. I love to wake up with you by my side...It makes my days better.
27. You always make me feel that you are by my side no matter what.
28. I love that feeling of being secure when you wrap your arms around me.
29. I love the way you keep your cool when I do something stupid.
30.Just being with you feels like I can defy the whole world.
31. You mean the world to me.
32. I like your small gestures that speak volumes about how much you care.
33. I love the way you treasure the gifts that I gave you.
34. I love the way you patch up with me after a tumultuous fight.
35. And, of-course, your intelligence, 'cause you were smart enough to fall in love with me ;-).

Saturday, January 17, 2009

my lovely friend's house.....eren

for me everyone hav their own dream to hav house n create their interior design. i think my friend from sweden but he is turkish guy, make a good decision to find house. i suggest him to stay at hillpark or panorama condo, but after i makr comparison, this condo better than hillpark n panorama condo. complete with car prk, shop, saloon, restaurant, small cinema, gym, sauna, swimming pool, squash court, bbq area, garden, playground...wwow its complete. maybe more facilities. he continue study in phd, n of course spend his time at home. he spent rm4500 to get complete set for furniture in home...i think its good decision.I wish can hav my dream house too later, a place for rest n relax.

rda design of my future office

behind sayfol international school n close too korean bbq.....if i agree to working at this office....i must wake up early every morning...too catch train n wait bus at avenue k, later..i should be profesional to facing any prblm......we will seee later...

not feeling well

since yesterday, i'm not feeling well....n today i'm fever a little bit, i'm wanna faint at klcc.......maybe no mood to eat since last tired.......come back from klcc, i got bad headache, n bad vomit....ohh my god...then sleep the whole nnight , still hav headache...but too hungry heheheh....wish i gonna ok tomorow......maybe too stress with many thing this day.........or people sya...i'm wanna growth up again. hhehehe but the truth is i'm not pregnant ok

walking in dark night

maybe i can say here...... " more hard u try to happy, its much hard u will getting hurt".i always try to make people happy , even i never care about myself. since a week ago, i feel lonely, many thing happen, until its broke my heart. i lost everything, n i hate myself too.i'm desperate to happy too, laughing, hav someone to love, even satisfy me in everything. i'm failed in my life. thats the truth.

happy birthday to TJ

to tj,
i wish u happy always , have great life, long life, n with someone u love. all the best

Friday, January 16, 2009

interview n life

on Wednesday, i got a call from rda-harris architects sdn. bhd for my interview on Thursday. Honestly, not many people know that, only some people because i want take it as my secret. but those know my interview, they r lucky. but something happen b4 i go to interview, i lost my salary slip, i'm still not update my cv n so on.

finally, after i replanning my time, n work, i can solve my prblm with well. then i 'm still thinking someone in my heart b4 i go to interview, maybe i need help, even support, but i told myself, finally everyone leaving u, n u must do by urself. i was late, but lucky i got taxi n go there. nice office, i really like. in my heart still i miss someone........then i fill the interview form, n its really nice because at the 2nd last paper hav 20 question about my life, even my sex life, love, ambition, n funny thing.

the question really make me laugh, n miss someone. then in meeting room, hav 2 panel will interview me., liza n faizal. i was nervous, n their question really make me worry n tired. we start at 4pm until 8pm...its really long time.liza is good person, she is brilliant n intelligent. n faizal also is the nice guy...hardworking, n cool guy.

in that interview, they asked me to make 3d model from sketch up, yes i did, but at same time i heard one voice behind me, i hate that voice until i cant concentrate myself for this interview. then again , i only think i wanna say i'm not interested to work there n only wanna share with someone close to me. after the time finished for 3d model, the both of them judge me n make critism, n honestly i told them, i cant do the 3de model, because i hav personal prblm, then liza still wanna know that., we talked n shred face to face, until she understand me, but i'm still confuse.......

then liza stil wanna me work there n already prepared a job offer letter for me, but i must thinking , n shared with someone i really comfortable n understand me. then she follow me n open the door for me with hope i accept her offer. its nice, but the personal prblm still make me crazy....

then i called someone i really miss, but maybe i'm not lucky, i came or called at not right time.i know what happen, i make big mistake.i should not hav feeling anymore, n again i feel i just a piece of cake in this life,. they will reject when they dont need u or even they hav another person. too bad foer me. i'm suprised actually. i'm sad.......i dont know....what should i say.....

Saturday, January 10, 2009

moving hometown soon

so nice when thinking about hometown, peaceful, harmony, safe, n beautiful. i love hometown...n of course everyone love their own homeland. chinese new year will coming soon, n my sister will engage with her future husband. its means the 1st group girl in front of me already hav partner, thats life.

this my arrangement members in my family.

girl, girl, girl, ME, man, man, girl,girl,girl

i started packing all goods at home in kl to move hometown soon. my responsible to help my Sweden friend already finish. he got house, got their own furniture n next monday his life in kl will start. so happy to see people happy n smiling, everything settle.

yeah i felt a little bit sad, but i'm ok. i feel strong, a least i dont hav anyone to miss in kl, except friend. i hav last week someone i loved very much as my best friend, but i already broken heart. no more chance, because i think i need move in front, n dont look at behind anymore. my bus ticket at 24 jan 2009, like a life ticket for me.......

hope everyone happy always...........i will miss all of you.

interview with malaysian airlines n air asia

should i try to grab this job? still not confident n blur. give up

mas airlines interview
saturday = 17.1.2009 (stewardess)
sunday= 18.1.2009 (steward)
mas kelana jaya training centre

air asia
sunday =11.1.2009
sunday =18.1.2009
park royal hotel

singapore airlines
21 february 2009 park royal

Tuesday, January 6, 2009

photo from haris, greece

this photo took since a month ago, so i just get from email from my friend at Greece. lucky he will work at Switzerland later. hope u have good life there, new place, new people n new job. huhuhu....i'm still looking for job, maybe continue my study .

happy birthday

today is my friend's birthday, but he not in kl now. so i wish you happy birthday n hope god bless you, long live, happy n always think positive.take care patrick

yesterday........something nice happen

i always wrote something bad b4, something not happy, now i think i should share my secret n make everyone not worry anymore. i'm always happy n smile, even sometime feel bored at home, bored something we did as routine everyday. that's why i like chatting, explore something new because i'm still young ,many thing i should know, as long as i care my family name, myself n not hurt or steal others people money.

let start the story...hahhaha. i hav one friend in kl from cuba, but we nver meet each other b4, so yesterday he on the way to his embassy, he invited me to hav coffee at kl sentral, luckily i'm free at hom, so i just go n meet him. wow.............nice guy with the good attitude, totally different with photo, maybe better than in photo. so we hav drink, he talking about himself, n he was stay in kl around 2 years. i really suprised with foriegner, how they can survive at another country without family, close friend even different food. for me, i feel worry n afraid, if that happen to me.

then we finished around 12pm , n i go back home n sleep, because last night i got bad sms in my life. hahahaha. let it go right...the world need my smile, n i need to be half the world too. so around 4pm i got a message from my Italian friend, he come back to kl because his flight at 3am , next morning. so we just spent time at chinatown n they shopping a lot......suddenly....... this is climaxs the story actually....... hahaha

one accident happened there, so we know each other n exchange phone number. this is my 1st time doing that. its crazy but bla bla.........i cant say anything. ask me if u wanna know. then we shopping around chinatown, i'm crazy with perfume n t shirt but luigi n matteo dont want buy it, i feel bad, but its ok save my money. its good price for me actually, also perfume. but finally i realize if i buy the perfume, its not so good. normal for unemployee thats all my life yesterday. we hav dinner at nandos, n i took that photo with my phone without thier permission. so everyone left me in kl, like the song below. also my other friend sylla from hong kong, michael from australia. nice to meet all of you. let me know if u need help next time.

since you're gone (selepas kau pergi)

today i walked around kl alone, see people n shopping a little bit.then i listened a song from my phone. yes i hav this song long time ago. indonesian song but really touching heart. maybe some people dont like this kind of music, but the lyric really sincere, deep, n great.its matching with the song. so u can listen because hab translation in english. so this song i give (right word) to everyone know me n leaving me here in kl n thier life too......hahhaha. so i'm here always for u, with sincere smile, open heart n of course lovely kiss.

xmas2008 n office

well this year, not so nice xmas actually, everyday i counted the day for my last day at office. n i took some photo for memory n wanna create something for fun. for the xmas photo, my best friend haida took that photo. something nice, the snow from bubble of soap was drop from above like snow. yeah i never touch snow b4. its look nice, lovely n cool. n some photo with my headphone........many nice song at last office, i forgot to copy. i wish all my office mate will hav good work there.i miss all of u.

One day b4 new year

most people like to enjoy at night b4 holiday, but for me I don’t like it. Since 5 year living in kl city, I never celebrate happy new year or for countdown. Most of the time I just spend at home, maybe I’m lucky my house on hill n can see around kl, even can see genting highland. So I just celebrate night at home with housemate. I hate place with crowded people, smoking area (sometime I like too), n see teenager with crazy attitude, n so on. Better I’m stay at home n relax.

So b4 everyone celebrate New Year at night, I went out with my university mate, afifah. So we went to cinema, that’s time, she wanna see Australia film, but don’t have good time to see, so we decide to watch bedtime story. One thing make me funny is when we wanna buy the ticket the sit already full, but we surprised only have free sit for couple. So I saw her face n asked her….. R we dating? Hahahah. Then we bought ticket but the sit only for couple.

so the bedtime story is very funny film, cute n sweet film, very nice. much motivate, nice hope with dream n of course its good for good. the kids in this movie also very cute n clever. so nice. so i suggest everyone must go n see that movie.

So we have lunch together, n she shared her problem with me, I bought new dairy, she bought new clothes for her bf. then we walked around waiting until 920pm because we also bought the ticket for our university mate for night movie, Histeria film. Its really spooky movie n nice too, so after finished the movie, both of us, hurry to go back home because have bad traffic, n we already tired because since afternoon, we at shopping complex. Then I celebrate New Year at home.

Monday, January 5, 2009

yellow cab pizza

last week i was walked alone in city because i'm bored at home. so i just walked around , n see life of kl especially people shopping for school opening later. then i found one restaurant, look nice n clean. so i just wanna try to know thier services. so i order MANHANTTAN MEATLOVERS. the gradients is chicken ham, beef pepperonji, italian beed sausage, ground beef, beed salami & beef bacon. n with coke. its nice but notdelicious pizza i ate with robert at singapore. i miss that pizza.

so something good at this shop is, the just provided recycle plate, boxes of pizza, water in can, so easy to services n clean after finish the food. but its too much for me, so i take away n share with housemate. the located is behind lrt dang wangi, on the way to imperial hotel. so go n try, nice interior inside, but not too much customer. they must do something like promotion n so on.

mafa was launched with new project

MAF Architects SDB. BHD. was established in 2004 in Kuala Lumpur. we believe in honest design, designs that have a direct response to environment, function, technology, climate and structural qualities. As architect firm, we working with innovative mindset and leadership.

The project will keep going....
1. Segenting Kra Channel, Thailand with Masterplan
2. Dumai - Kl Bridges with Masterplan
3. Terengganu Chinatown Conservation
4. Proton proposal reality tv
5. Kuala Lumpur Underneath Triangle Zone

looking for therapist for myself

Nowdays, i really feeling bad, i already contacted counselor to get treatment for myself. just pray for me, i will do the best for myself,one thing i want from all of u, don't hurt me too much. i really nice to all of u, pls love me, care me, n if u dont like me, pls be gentleman and honest. i'm believe any problem hav solution.i love u all

4 january 2009, 235535pm

" ariff,it is best if we are no longer in contact. wishing you all the best"

i know i should not write about sad again, but i think i wanna finish this prblm tonight b4 i'm sleep. sorry to everyone. because i think after 10 years, when i read this again, i will remember i hav special friend 10 years ago. n i love them very much, like i love myself.

yesterday i was checked my email n i saw 2 nice photo, n i'm smile, laughing n its really funny.its was 2 month ago. i felt i know them for long time ago....they really means to me. i learn many thing about this life from them. Even, when i sad, when i hav prblm , i always share with them. Thats about yesterday. Today, i got that's sentences at my phone. i try to be strong, i read many time until i asked my housemate to explain me. my housemate told me, "pity of u, they won't be in contact anymore. r u did mistake".......i accept is with open heart because i'm ready for everything. n i just smile to my housemate.

oooh god........why i should face this prblm, then suddenly my tears moving fast.....i cant stop anymore. i felt guilty....i try to find my mistake..... one of friend come to me n asking me, "why i'm sad n crying again, do u do a big mistake?" i'm confuse...i know the reason but if thats make them feeling bad, i will go. i will go with open heart. i'm ready for everything although its hurt for me. i should face this prblm, but only one wish from me to them, pls become together forever.

i always involved myself n become 3rd person in one relationship, i try to not involve, but i ts always happen. here i wanna say sorry to everyone. i wanna say to p_ _ _ _ _ _, i really sory n forgive me. i want u happy n always be together, i will go , if thats make all become normal.

Sunday, January 4, 2009

good price to rent house in kl area

since a week ago, i'm busy to find a rent house for my friend from sweden, because he will continue study in kl. so as phd student, he wanna save his budget at same time hav good life, house in kl. so its very diffult to me to find it. so here some infomation to everyone.

red= university lrt
orange=vista angkasa
green= blok pkns
yellow=pantai panorama
blue= hillpark

here some infomation about rent house in kl,
1) vista angkasa,
2) greenfield
3) riana green
4) pantai panorama condo
5) pantai hillpark apartment
6) city one condo
7) menara alpha, wangsa maju

vista angkasa , pantai panorama n hillpark actually close to my house. its nice place, many people crazy to get house this area because its good place, easy public transportation, close to food area...i think its perfect area.

1. vista angkasa
rm1200- rm1300
fully furnished but no ac
security not good
gym n swimming not good enough

2. hillpark apartment
-very nice place, Mediterranean concept
- many foreigner stay here because its nice place
- rm1800 fully furnished
- swimming pool n gym....very nice
- i suggest u to hav this, i'm sure u not regret

3. panorama condo
- its nice place too
- the cheapest only rm1500 for study with fully furnished
- gym n swimming pool also good
- public transport also good
- most foreigner stay here

4. riana green
- very far from city but its really nice place
- many foreigner too
- very difficult to get taxi, but u can call taxi
- just a studio..but its nice place
- rm1300

5. greenfield/anjung hijau apartment
- a little far from city but close to train station too
- still hav public transportation like bus n taxi, easy than riana
- rm1300
- gym n swimming not sure yet
-student n foreigner also stay here

6. city one condo
- just in front ur university
- hav gym n swimming pool
- rm1800
- i hate this area because in city,
- we need green area, safe n harmony
- although the price same with hill park but hillpark more relax place
- if in city , its easy for u to move, no need spend money for transportation

7.menara alpha
- not so familiar this area
- rm1300- rm1400

i'm sory

i know, its quite long time i'm not update my blog, because i was fired from my job, i lost my focus especially my life too. even i'm not go to gym because feeling stress, give up n worry. i try go gym but i'm easy get tired, i cant take much weight for my muscle, so its make me more give up.i got many message from friend and asking me what wrong with me n so on. soryy again, i will write some infomation later.

last time i promise will not writing about sad thing anymore. This blog not sad blog, so i try to make hapy for that. i wanna thanks to everyone which is gave me support when i hav hard time like this. i try to not give up, n be strong. maybe as architecture student, i always working, working n do working. when i hav free time, i try to find work. right now when i dont hav job, i feel like nothing, i lost, so tired without no work or again thanks to everyone helped me, love me, appreciate me, care me, ......i'm owe many thing from all of u.